Funny Jamie Fraser Pillow Case for Jammf Fans

Did anyone else notice that Valentine's Day fell on the first day of a long, holiday weekend? I noticed. Not that I did anything super special with that extra time; I basically just sat around thinking about how to break down this photo. But maybe you were one of those people who took the extra long weekend and corporate directive to "get busy" seriously, so you missed that Starz released a totally nekkid picture of Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser. If that's you, then kudos on the romance in your life, but I gotta say: you missed out. But don't worry. If you haven't had time to navigate through all your feelings about it, Bekah and I broke them all down for you.

Bekah Makes an Outlander Confession

Beth: First things first: Have you seen the alternate ending trailer yet? Because … it's been out for like a MONTH now.
Bekah: YES. I was going to talk to you about that. I was underwhelmed ANDD…. i think it might be because I waited.. i dunno.. 3 weeks to watch it?
and it was so built up in my head. By your reactions (ALL of your reactions) I assumed we were seeing like ALL of the jamie-losing-his-virginity scene
Beth: Yeah, I thought that might happen for you.
Bekah: I honestly don't even think i had a reaction other than "oh hey- the ending is different. more jamie"
I know. i know. I'm alone in this, but…. i was a tad disappointed
Beth: That totally makes sense. everyone screaming OMG OMG JAMIE I LOVE YOU STARZ THANKS and it's like .03 seconds
Bekah: I'm like "wait what? how is this different? there's a fully clothed (kinda) jamie?" HOW IS THIS SOMETHING TO FREAK OUT OVER PEOPLE
if people are freaking over THAT…. i can't imagine when we actually have something good to show
Beth: that was my reaction: like if this makes me inordinately happy … HOW IN THE WORLD am I going to handle the show
Because even though it was short, it was pretty exciting to see it
And it gave us this:

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 Jesus plays Jamie in Outlander: The Space Musical

 Bekah: Another fun fact about outlander is that last night before I went to bed, husband yells out "I'm watching Outlander"
and I'm like "THE MUSICAL?" because obviously that's all that exists
Beth: haha
Bekah: and he looks at me with that look– you know the one– the omg you are obsessed with something that has a MUSICAL attached to it -look

[Beth: SIDENOTE: HOW is there not a Twilight/Hunger Games/Fever Series musical yet? Get on that, theatre nerds]

Bekah: anyway, it turns out there is some movie with that guy who plays Jesus from passion of the christ
Beth: OH GOD I KNOW
Bekah: The townspeople are in kilts and it's from space or something. he SWEARS they were trying to trick people into thinking it was THE outlander
Beth: I KNOW. stupid jim caviezle and his taking up space on the Outlander tumblr tag
Bekah:  HAHAHAHAH he watched the whole thing. he was like "I THOUGHT THIS WAS OUTLANDER" and i'm like.. UGH… the fact that I #1 TOLD you it wasn't #2 there was a JESUS guy from SPACE didn't give it away?
Beth: there's like one incredibly annoying Jim Caviezel stan on tumblr who blogs and reblogs gifs from that crappy movie every day and clogs up the outlander tag. Like people aren't tracking the Outlander tag to look at cars and Space Jesus, okay?

 Jesus has knock-knees?

Beth: So lets talk about THE PIC
this one

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Bekah: whoa JESUS IN A KILT
Beth: So much Jesus in this breakdown
If Jamie had knock knees like that NO ONE WOULD EVER DO HIM
Bekah: NEVER
"I hitched my leg up and around Jamie's knock knees" #notsexy
looks like he's padding up for a game of soccer with the other shepherds
Beth:  "I watched him walk away with his strange gait … his large knees slightly brushing one another with each step." Ew. #nothot
Bekah: hahahaha

Totally Normal Naked Jamie merchandise suggestions

Beth: Anyhoo … so starz released this pic on Vday

and I mean, what are we supposed to do with this?
Bekah: ugh besides laminate it and stick it under my pillow?
b/c that's what I did … immediately
Beth: I mean sure, I made some tea coozies
And I wall papered my walk in closet
Bekah: obviously… who wouldn't paper their closet in JAMMF?
Beth: My husband needs daily motivation to go to the gym. Everywhere he looks: shirtless JAMMF. I'm being so selfless here
Bekah: I immediately created a cardboard cut out of this image
looks semi-strange b/c it's just of him waist up, but i can sit him in the window and he looks at me when i leave for work in the am
and he's there when i return
scared the shit out of me tonight because I forgot
Beth: I put him in my medicine cabinet so he's always there to hand me my contact solution and CHI hair polish
Bekah: so kind that JAMMF
Beth: he's a sweetheart really; stingy about my waxing strips though.
the life size one I printed out is over my headboard, watching over me like a guardian angel
his eyes and his nipples follow me everywhere though, so it's pretty f*cking weird
Bekah: haha

This break down is brought to you by the word BIGGER

Bekah: okay can we just jump into THE PIC ITSELF RQ b/c…. um.. HELLO
i'm gonna have to counter all the "i thought he would be bigger" with THIS. THIS PICTURE
BIGGER? Do you SEE those biceps?
BIGGER? Do you SEE Those abs?
Beth: what are the chest muscles called again? pectorals?
Bekah: yes
Beth: his pectoral girdle is obscene
Bekah: Man boobs. but the hot kind
he was actually BIGGER than i expected
Beth: OBLIQUES. They are all I care about. A man who can get his obliques in order deserves olympic gold and a nooner
Bekah: YES
Beth: The angle is weird though. Like his forearms looks dwarfed or something
Bekah: haha you're right. the one on OUR right, his left, looks like a tiny forearm. actually they both do. that's weird. i hadn't noticed
Beth: it's like that kristin wigg character with the doll arms
giant shoulders, tiny hands … but whatever, he's still killing it BIGGER

Life Lessons from Twilight

Beth: I saw someone asking if he had fake chest hair and DIED … they were all "Where is Jamie's happy trail, Starz!?"
Bekah: NO, ugh, people STOP
he's a person with ACTUAL body parts … this isn't a BOOK character.
this is a MAN and that is real chest hair
Beth: But he … kind of is a book character. I mean. DAMN. He is so totally Jamie right there.
Bekah: I mean YES. sure he IS
but this is also the picture of a MAN… i'm not saying we don't ogle him. WE DO. I'm just saying… lets try to keep the dick talk to a minimum, and if I'M saying that….
Beth: the lesson here is, ladies: If Bekah can cool it, so can you.
Bekah: haha.
Beth: yeah, I felt just a SLIGHT bit of "ICK objectification much" when I first saw it.
Like ok, we can lust after Jamie because he's fictional, but this is like "LOOK AT SAMMF!!! LOOK AT HIS ASSETS."
And that felt weird because like …. Sam is on twitter and is real and stuff
Bekah: right … I THINK that's what makes it weirder … like… 1) Rob Pattinson doesn't know how to use the internet
Beth: … so it is perfectly acceptable to objectify him on the internet
Bekah: Plus he dresses homeless in real life. So when he looks like a hot PIECE. it's like.. holy shit. rob looks like a hot piece let's talk about it. but still…. I draw the line at "omg where is his happy trail which leads to that happy BODY PART OMG LET'S SEE IT AND TWEET SAM WE CAN'T WAIT"
Beth: Like HotRob is almost a character he plays for GQ and Details. But HotSAMMF is like kiiind of every day Sam and that makes me feel icky bc you know. Hi, Sam. *waves from twitter*
Oh god. New thought: Rob is kind of unattainable, but Sam is not.
(I don't really think that) but it's kinda true
Bekah: HAHAHAH
Beth: Rob's a movie star. Sam is a goofy actor from the UK
Bekah: YEP. the only thing they have in common is…. the same queen and hoodies
Beth: and being on my list
Bekah: yes

Forever on my list, bb

Beth: but yeah, different leagues. If you talk about Rob or Ryan Gosling online, they aren't going to see it. But Sam just might. So slow your roll, Outlander fans. He has a mom.
Bekah: (that we know of) … He has a brother. that's for sure
Beth: he talked about his mom in an interview. So confirmed: SHE LIVED AT ONE POINT along with his brother, Frodo Heughan
Bekah: hahahah
Beth: I followed him on insta. @MrFrodoHeughan
Bekah: not ugh are you for rea?
Beth: NO. His name isn't Frodo, for one thing.
Bekah: you never know…you have a way of learning these things … like old nicknames of Sam's brother #hackerskillz
Beth: I mean, I do know he has some family members on social, but i'm not following them because I am a self aware person of moderate sanity
Bekah: slow claps
Beth: BUT I have noticed some outlander fans following said family members and want to shaken-baby-syndrome their stalker selves
Bekah: ughhh sick
Beth: like the people that flirt on twitter with his old co-stars: THAT WILL NOT GET YOU SAMMF LAID, ladies
Bekah:  hahahahhahaha
Beth: Doesnt matter how many Heughligan tshirts you send to Robin#2 from Batman Live, Sam will not do you on his mackenzie tartan
Bekah: hahahahah it's SO like twilight all over again
OMG who is the brit-pack of the outlander fandom? the guy from the musical?
does Sam have any pub-playing mediocre musician pals whose shows we  can start to attend ??
Beth: He likes Frightened Rabbit. We could stalk them like groupies. Follow around the mustache guy from the Tenant's Lager adverts, to see if he meets Sam for a pint
Bekah: haha okay. i'm in
Beth: I'll see if he's making any US road trips, offer him a couch
Bekah: God the stories we could share… remember that girl who left her husband b/c of the britpack…that's a thing that happened. ohhh twilight fandom
stephenie meyer would be so proud of you

Hide it under a bushel, Starz

Beth: RQ back to the pic: is someone watching them in the foreground? like is that mrs fitz's shoulder?
Bekah: yeah they have a voyuer
Beth: murtagh likes to peep … which I think is actually kind of true if I remember The Exile correctly.
Bekah: when is this scene? inside… fixing his shoulder? are they flirty flirty yet?
Beth: Yeah, from the "I Come to the Castle" chapter
This is when he says, "I've been hurt by people much less pretty"
so yeah, he's flirty
Bekah: he really just looks… like JAMIE here sighhhh
Beth: he does … he's about to tell her about the beatings. *sad* his face looks contemplative
Are you having a hard time NOT thinking of Sam when you think of Jamie now?
Bekah: Well… I actually haven't really READ much of anything since we've "gotten to know" (hahahahhaha) Sam. I feel like I was hardcore into my reading in late summer/Early Fall and it's just be in the past few months that we've really become intimate with Sam (again.. hahahahahah laughing/second-hand embarrassed for myself) but… thinking of Sam as anything BUT Jamie…like.. yanno… Robin is weird
Beth: HE WAS BATMAN, Bekah. Get it right.
Bekah: haha i literally watched 10 seconds of the Batman interview and couldn't watch more
Beth: He's just as earnest being Live!Arena!Show! Batman as he is as Jamie.
But for me, I have a VERY clear idea of who Jamie is in my head, and even though I've only reread the 1st and 2nd book since Sam was cast, like he's BECOMING Jamie for me
Bekah: I mean.. we've seen/heard him do what.. TWO things?
i think it'll be SEALED once we get a good.. 30 seconds…. or a scene or a Jamie-centered trailer
Beth: Yeah, i need more.
He IS Jamie, but Jamie still isn't Sam. Does that make sense?
Bekah: Yes
Beth: I"m sure the first real glimpse of him we get, maybe "if you'll take the lassie off my chest" scene will just slay us all.
Bekah: YES… and … can I put it out on the universe that I hope they give the Breaking Dawn/Twilight saga treatment to the Wedding or more specifically– the honeymoon scene? i want to see NOTHING until i see it buffering after I DL it illegally b/c i can't afford starz
JK JK JK i'll get starz by then
Beth: I totally agree, that is NOT a scene that I want spoiled for me. KEEP IT UNDER WRAPS, Starz [PS I am already a Starz subscriber, and have been for many years. Just FYI *better fan*] Bekah: WRAP THAT SHIT UP TIGHT
Beth: Pitchfork us at TN if you don't agree, but stick the bridal chamber scene under a bushel. Don't let that light shine.
Wrap that shit up like Claire does Jamie's shoulder. THANKS.

So, what do you guys think? Are you like me and Bekah: do you want to keep some things under wraps so you can see it for the first time WHEN YOU REALLY SEE IT? Anyone else being followed by SAMMF's nips?

Check ALL our Outlander coverage!   Including More Breakdowns here and here!

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Source: https://thats-normal.com/2014/02/breaking-naked-jamie-fraser/

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